On parties.

In retrospect, there are a few interesting things I have learned about myself via drinking over the last weekend that I feel are worth putting to (imaginary) paper.

1) Feminism is a big deal to me.
1a) I am a very cheesy lady.
These two things might not seem to be connected, but trust me, they are. Case in point: Saturday evening, while drunk, I heatedly discussed, in terrible Japanese, the importance of women having self-pride and self-direction to two Japanese girls who I seemed to have decided needed to hear about the One True Way. Since, of course, their replies were in Japanese and I was (again) drunk, I'm not entirely sure I understood their viewpoints, but they nodded a lot and seemed encouraging when I spoke. Unbearable cheesiness of this: I may have told them that they could be President (or prime minister). Unbearable self-consciousness indicated by this conversation: I am pretty sure I got on the topic of feminism because one of the girls complimented my hair.

2) I like being dramatic.
2a) I hate being dramatic.
2b) Maybe what I really like is being dramatic with an excuse and a 50-75% chance no one is going to remember what I was doing the next day.
These deductions have come from the following realizations: I really enjoy karaoke while doing karaoke. Yet, every morning I wake up after having realized I was at karaoke the night before, I am embarrassed and uncomfortable. Also, I prefer to sing duets, to hide my shame behind the shame of someone else. This doesn't have quite enough of an effect when you're singing "Killing Me Softly" slouched halfway down onto the floor for emphasis.

3) Maybe I can't cook after all.
Evidence: My attempt to make marinated vegetable kebabs at the barbecue. I am pretty sure the marinade I made would have worked for something at some time, and people seemed moderately impressed by the amount of spice-adding I seemed to be doing, but the vegetables didn't cook all that well and at least one landed on the ground (and stayed there) during the grilling process. Also, when I got home the next day, my things were sticky with balsamic vinegar.

4) I want people to think I am cool.
Why else would I keep smoking every time I get drunk, and making such stupid faces at the camera? Whyyyy?

5) I hate shoes.
I really, really should not be taking off my shoes in a public area. Especially not the lobby of a karaoke joint, while smoking. If nothing else, it really undermines whatever small positive effects number 4 might have had. I wish the digital camera had never been invented.